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[Hello and welcome to another exquisite edition of The Week in News, your reliable resource of gratifying gaming news brought to you by Gamer Limit.]

Another Sunday has dawned, which means it’s once again time for me to carefully compile every last titbit of gaming news into one bite-sized morsel.

Then again, here in the UK most people will be too busy hurling stones at Mr. Nick Griffin to care for the real world issues that await you after the break. Hurrah for irrelevant topical reference!

All hell is set to break loose come this November when Modern Warfare 2 finally erupts, but some soldiers won’t be too keen to join the PC army after a bombshell hit the dedicated servers. As a result, at the time of writing over 150,000 crying players left messages of contempt over Infinity Ward’s sacrilege in an online petition. Come to think of it, when was the last time a petition actually had any effect on anything? I signed up to make Jeremy Clarkson Prime Minister but that didn’t work, and Infinity Ward certainly seems to be standing their ground on the battlefield.

Still, if all else fails you always have the option to bludgeon your monitor to death with your keyboard if you dare to read the system requirements of Modern Warfare 2. Or if you are as health and safety conscious as Sony, why not go one step further and produce an expensive contraption that will slingshot your new PS3 into a Sony Bravia plasma television? Whilst I feel sorry for the plasma casualty, I can’t help but let out a murmur of excitement over such wanton destruction like the small child that I am.

In other news, the stubborn, petulant child that is Left 4 Dead 2 still won’t go away – I for one am becoming emphatically bored of reporting on it, to be honest. Want to guess what it’s done this time? No, you’d be wrong as it’s only gone and got itself expelled in the form of an Australian ban. Again. Still, there’s always the censored version and, whilst we’re talking about paranormal activity, a new trailer was also leaked in conjunction with the good news.

Meanwhile, a gentleman who has a penchant for overhyping undeserved games thought it would be a good idea to list his pick of innovative games – approach with caution. To be honest, it was about as believable as the news that Need For Speed had managed to speed past the 100 million milestone. Yes, the series that is solely responsible for turning herds of teenagers into tasteless drones that will stop at nothing to butcher cars with ungainly body kits is still growing strong, sadly.

Q-Games are not a happy developer. Thanks to the pirates that sail the open seas of the interweb, PSP owners may not be seeing any more future ports. That would be a crying shame indeed, and I am of the opinion that pirates should be wholly ashamed of such dastardly deeds. Really, I am.

Slapdash journalism was also apparent this week, with a report from ABC that claimed excessive play time with games will lead to great pain. In other words, video games have once again been billed as highly dangerous. Oh dear. Unfortunately, Transmission Games, the people who brought you earth shatteringly mainstream titles such as Ashes Cricket 2009, were also the latest games developers to close its doors and so to brighten the tone, here are some videos of demented Japanese women playing video games.

Alternatively, there was the fantastic news of Band Hero’s soundtrack to strengthen our spirits. In fact, I was so excited to receive this enlightening news that I proceeded to regurgitate my innards as a result of the excess sugar. Can you tell how much I want this game?

I was equally distressed from the announcement of the closure of the classic Calling All Cars. Why didn’t anyone play this magnificent gem of a game? How I miss the days of squealing “oh my god it’s a hot potato!” in an eccentric Irish accent.

Just about everyone on this planet is playing Uncharted 2 right now bar me, and so to rub salt into the wounds Naughty Dog swiftly announced that DLC will soon be on its way. Operation Flashpoint: Dragon Rising was also set to follow suit by jumping onto the DLC bandwagon.

To wrap things up, here are a few release date announcements and videos for you to chew on. Movie tie-in Avatar was granted a December release date, the part horror/action/survival FPS Metro 2033 was showcased in a trailer and the gravity defying Inversion was announced. Finally, the retro remake Rocket Knight was confirmed to be receiving a thorough scrape and polish for its next generation incarnation.

And finally

Here is a poignant reminder of how the seemingly innocent Wii can be more harmful than it led you to believe; especially to plasma televisions.

That’s all folks! As always, thanks for reading and don’t forget to check out our sparkling giveaways every Monday. Failing that, you should always feel compelled to start your own fancy blog with us unless you want me to throw stones at you.

  1. Haha, awesome work, Martin. Sarcasm and sleep deprivation work well together!

  2. I’m not in this one. That’ll teach me to go on vacation for a week! Good job anyway British kid!

  3. Thanks for the weekly recap Martin. :-)

  4. All work and no Uncharted 2 makes Martin something, something.

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