If there is one constant in the video game universe, it’s that red will always battle blue. This war of attrition has been fought from the rings of Halo to the fields of Azeroth. No one is quite sure how this epic struggle for dominance first started, but everyone does agree that the only way it will end is in blood shed.
Recently the fine makers of Mountain Dew have decided to add to this ongoing struggle with their new Red and Blue Game Fuel. Which side will win this battle to quench your thirst? Hit the break!
In case you don’t know, this new Mountain Dew “World of Warcraft” Game Fuel is a yearly attempt by the company to make money from all the gamers in the world who thrive off their caffeine filled beverages. If you watch any sort of testosterone filled television, you should have seen the new Game Fuel commercials by now. In true Red vs. Blue fashion, these commercials show two World of Warcraft characters fighting to the death in a super market. Why are they fighting you might ask; because one of them is purchasing blue game fuel while the other is purchasing red game fuel. What other reason is there to fight in a super market?
I must admit that I was very intrigued when I first saw these commercials. First of all, I am a huge World of Warcraft fan, so the inclusion of these characters from the game piqued my interest pretty quickly. Yes I know that the drink really has nothing to do with the game, but I’m a typical consumer, so I’m supposed to be easily susceptible to these kinds of marketing tricks. I am also a big fan of Mountain Dew, and a fan of trying new things, so a chance to drink a new caffeine filled beverage from the company had my taste buds going crazy.
With my mind made up, I made my way to the local convenience store and picked up both types of “World of Warcraft” Game Fuel. I have just recently finished both bottles of the colorful drinks and I’m ready to not only share my thoughts on them, but to hopefully prepare you for what to expect. After all, in the ongoing struggle between red and blue, knowing is half the battle.
Red Game Fuel
Upon quick inspection of the bottles you’ll notice the red game fuel is adorned with the image of an “evil” Orc. Now any misinformed person would take this to mean that the red drink represents the evil side of the battle, but this is just not the case. The Orcish Horde are not all a bunch of blood thirsty savages. They used to be a peaceful race. Unfortunately that all changed thanks to an extremely long and drawn out story arc, and now they just enjoy killing and pillaging. That being said, you should not approach the red drink as the evil of the two drinks. It is simply one side of the war.
The description of the drink on the front of the bottle says “DEW with a Blast of Citrus Cherry Flavor.” You would think that with a description like that, your taste buds would be overwhelmed by all of the citrus flavor included in a gulp of this drink. Unfortunately you would be wrong. When you first take a sip of Red Game Fuel, you tongue is immediately hit with the citrus flavor, but that sensation is followed up with an extreme blast of overwhelming sweetness. This sweetness completely over powers the citrus flavor and leaves a horrible taste in your mouth.
Imagine if you took a sip of regular cherry Kool-Aid, and then immediately followed it up by a gulp of Kool-Aid with 10 times the amount of recommended sugar. That is what it’s like to drink the Red Game Fuel. It was so horrible it took me almost 2-3 days to finish the bottle. To put it in terms us gamers can understand, drinking the Red Mtn Dew Game Fuel is like playing some of the worst games ever created. It’s the Daikatana of the soft drink world. Other games that come to mind when I think of this drink are Too Human, Big Mutha Truckers, Enter the Matrix, Haze, and every 3D Sonic the Hedgehog game every created.
Blue Game Fuel
The Blue Game Fuel bottle is covered with the image of beautiful female Night Elf. This shouldn’t be a shock, because every female Night Elf in World of Warcraft is hot. I mean video games can’t have unattractive women in them, right? Who would want to play those types of games? That being said, I am pretty sure the blue game fuel is supposed to represent the “good” side of the red vs. blue battle. I can totally agree with this, seeing as this is the only one of the two drinks that actually tastes good.
The blue game fuel is supposed to be infused with “a Punch of Wild Fruit Flavor”. I’m not sure what wild fruit that’s referring to, but whatever it is, it’s good stuff. Unlike the red game fuel, the blue variation does not hit you with a blast of overwhelming sweetness after the first second. The drink is still incredibly sweet, but not in an overwhelming way that ruins the experience. This is very important, because it actually makes this beverage tolerable to drink. I might even go as far as saying I enjoyed drinking it, and I might even buy this version of game fuel again.
To put this in terms a gamer could best understand, drinking Blue Game Fuel is like playing a mediocre game like Assassin’s Creed. It has everything it needs to be great, but it just falls a little short. Other games that come to mind when I think of this drink are 50 Cent: Blood in the Sand, Bionic Commando, The Conduit, and The Force Unleashed.
Blue wins this battle, but not the war
So as you can see, I clearly enjoyed the Blue Mountain Dew Game Fuel much more than the Red. I just can’t stand drinking anything that has been overly sweetened to the point you make funny faces when you drink it. I don’t even really understand why these drinks are being marketed to gamers. Are we supposed to enjoy really sweet beverages? Did I miss that memo? The only benefit I can see is the high levels of caffeine. Is a little taste with my caffeine too much to ask?
You probably have completely different taste preferences then myself, so if you really want to try them out I would recommend getting both. In the end though, you should probably just stick to regular Mountain Dew, because neither one comes close to the original. The original Mountain Dew is the Half-Life 2 and the Metal Gear Solid of the high caffeinated beverage world. It just can’t be topped.
So have any of you tried these new Mountain Dew drinks yet? If so what did you think?