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Avatar ImageKung-Fu Panda Rant
By: | February 2nd, 2009
Editorial |X360


Kung-Fu Panda: An awful young child targeted movie turned into an equally awful game.

The Blob: Something that should be considered a review, wants to be considered a review, but only talks about how bad something was. Resulting in a blob of negativity.

Back when I received my Xbox 360 two things came with it in a “bundle”. These were two games; Lego Indiana Jones and Kung-Fu Panda. Hearing how bad Lego Indiana Jones was I refused to touch it, and by nature I refuse to touch any game based off a kids movie. Especially when they have to fall back into putting them into system bundles. That was until today when I had not a thing better to do. I enjoy being fair in my judgments, which counteracts my dislike of playing games based off certain movies. This led me to decide to turn it on and see what abomination they came up with this time.

A fairly good abomination as it appears. I’d also like to point out that “Fairly good” is usually a compliment although when the word “abomination” is directly after it the meaning changes.

The game starts off with a horrible voice over at a loading screen that goes over what ever is going on at the moment. The loading takes so long at this point that you might as well listen to the entire thing since you just listened to half of it. Although the loading does go a little quicker at later times that doesn’t stop the point I’d rather not be forced to listen to the jibber-jabber.

When you finally get into the game you are greeted by an awful camera angle and even worse controls. The camera tends to change on its own no matter where you place it meaning you may as well suck it up and go with it.

The paths are extremely linear with no chance of you ever being able to not go where you are supposed too. There are small little off sections but they do not count due to actually being places you need to go to get to another place you need to go.

The entire premise of the game is run around, hit things doing ridiculous “kung-fu” that your character can apparently do even though his jump/double jump are so small in comparison that you wonder why they added a double jump in the first place. Not only that you have to collect “coins” that are used for upgrades to your character to apparently make it better. Which means if you want to get anywhere in the game you better be able to waste time finding the hidden coins and all that ‘fun stuff’.

As mentioned the game has awful voice acting, you will not get sucked into the characters at all. It may have been more effective to use robot/computer voices. Not saying that they didn’t try, they did, but as they say, “If at first you don’t succeed, you fail.”

The only thing worth mentioning are the graphics(Which aren’t completely awful for a game based from a movie)  but considering this is on a ‘next-gen’ system praising graphics is like praising an elderly person for taking a nap; It’s going to happen no matter what so why bother.

In the end I personally wish there was a possible way to trade both of the games that came with the Xbox for another one that isn’t a waste of time.

  1. I lol’d pretty hard throughout the movie, so I’m going to have to defend it.

  2. There is a difference between movies and the games based off of them. I have yet to find a game that didn’t go off the beaten path just for an excuse to have more content.

    The only times I have played a game based off a movie was to, well, play a game based off the movie not a game with the same theme as the movie.

  3. From what I played it wasn’t a bad game, just completely average in every way

  4. Yeah. I found a pretty decent God of War clone in it. I didn’t mind it too much at all.

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